By the time you read this, we'll be already on the plane. I've published the time such that this post will only be shown, after 4.20am.

Yesterday, I went to have a last meet up with my Secondary friends, of which 3 I can't bear to leave. Mingxuan, Randolph and Winifred. Dinner was nice, reminiscing about the good old times we had in class, the after school chill outs, the times we mugged at Randolph's place etc. They bought me a nice top from TOPMAN and a winter wear from A&F. Then I went off to meet up my JC pals. Had supper and yup bid farewell. (I didn't have much unwillingness to part them though. Don't ask me why.)

Today, it's 10.50pm right now, but I'm drafting this post at 4.20am tomorrow. In the afternoon, we all went back from Pris's house, a place where all of us left with tears and sorrows, the unwillingness to part, etc. It hurts and like what you said, a cruel separation. I know it's expected of us leaving, but you never thought it will be so soon.

The moment you reached, Pris's eyes were welled up with tears. So was mine. Knowing that this meeting is bound to be teary, but we still insist on it because it's so-called the one last time we'll meet before years. Hopefully I'm able to get a return ticket on my birthday. Zach, Christy, Lek, Mab, ValG, Liangjie, Darryl, Zu, Olivia was there. But I guess the hardest part was to part with Zu, Lek and Mab.

Entering the door with tears, leaving her home, again, with tears welled up. This is painful, very very painful. We all know that we'll meet again, but the feeling is different like what Mab and Zu said. It is part and parcel of life, that one, comes and go, everything seems to be fated, but again, not. We could somehow choose if we want to, but we chose a route which benefit us, and put others in pain. This is a neither short nor long route. Years down the road, we hope each and everyone of us will not be forgotten, memories will not be erased, in fact framed up in our minds. I'll always remember you guys who made me crazier, tougher and more independent.

Few years back, I thought it was silly of some to cry over friends. I told myself that I'll never cry over friends because when I was back there studying in Secondary 2, I never have such close friends, who really share my joy and sorrows, watch me do things that I like and they don't, support me for everything I want, listen to my boring stories which will never interest them, go to such extend to cheer me up anytime, anywhere.. There are so many things to list. And right now, tears are rolling down my cheeks, I can't deny that I can't bear to leave this place, where all my loved ones are.

There are many people I can't bear to leave, of which the one I can't bear most is you. You are the one who make me worry the most, you are the reason for all my tears..

The one who's always so impulse, so crazy, doing everything that you like, without thinking of the outcome. Yes, you are daring, you are courageous but sometimes, what you do really worries me. I'm afraid you'll do the wrong crazy thing and regret, or go so crazy that you don't even know what you're doing. I used to like you, but now since you have Ridley with you, I'm more reassured that you're safe and in good hands of someone, who will always put you in front of himself.

We're leaving, I know it's a great blow to you. But I'm glad that you've thought it through, you understood what's good for us, and surprisingly this time, you didn't create a big hoo-ha to make us stay. While reading this, you prolly see yourself as a wilful, stubborn, overbearing girl. That was you. You've changed, that's what all of us observed. Even the most ridiculous girl, Pris agreed with what I say. From stubborn to a much more understanding girl..

It's good that throughout this 3 years, you've made great changes, great good changes in fact. You've grown up, slowly into a slightly more mature lady, but still as rough. I will always remember the times you scream "Bry Bry" when you're angry with me for tickling you, the times you wanna pinch my nips, I dodge and you give me that pathetic let-me-pinch look, the times you force sour power into my mouth and I immediately ask you to get out of my house, the times you lay on my shoulder and ask me what to do, the times I cab down to East Coast to look for you, wiping off your forever-flowing tears, SWG. Till now you're still wondering what's SWG. Silly Weeping Girl.

Now, whenever you're sad, look for Lek, Ridley, Huiling, and almost everyone. Because they are there and are willing to stay by your side, not only to share your joy, but sorrow. Turn in to them, and stop going out alone at night. It's dangerous, you know it yourself. Promise me, to control your anger and not be angry over the slightest thing. Promise me that you'll continue to be more understanding. Promise me that you'll treasure everyone around you. Because I can assure you that everyone is very concerned about you and we all want the best for you. Ridley will be there for you but next year, you gotta be way more understanding than this. A level isn't hard and you want him to do his best also, right? No more East Coast, no more playground, no small park. No more..

I thank you for all the times you were there for me, though I were there for you more than you were there for me. I thank you for making me buy infinite cheesecakes for you when you're upset. I thank you for buying tiramisu cakes for me when I'm mugging. I thank you for massaging me when you know I'm dead tired and my body is aching all over. I thank you for the hearts and card you gave today, I'll safe keep them and show them to you after I'm done with my overseas studies. I thank you for listening to my problems when I'm feeling so vexed and I couldn't find anyone to talk to. I thank you for the pat on my head whenever I give you the cocky look. I thank you for bringing laughter into my life. I thank you, I thank you. There are so many things that I've to thank you for. For making my life wonderful and filled with the best moments that I never thought I will have. Thank you.

The next person I'm worried about is Mab. Your jaws are prolly wide apart now cos I don't think you ever expect yourself to be the second person I worry. I worry for you are a clubber, for you do things that even the craziest girl I thought will not do. Smoke lesser, try to cut down on them. They won't do you good. No more suicides or whatever before I abandon my studies and fly back to strangle you. Puff lesser, eat more fruits and veggies. I know you're smart but partying 4 5 times a week will definitely drain you out.

Then will be Lek. Thank you for helping me console that SWG. I know our departure hurt you as much. I saw the tears in your eyes, but still, you want to be the coolest guy, you didn't let them flow. I know it's been hard on you, to act like it's nothing for us to leave because you don't want to affect the girls. Thank you for the sharing of exam tips etc, the TCC session we had, which was supposed to be study sessions but turned out as chatting session. The times you came over my house just to ask me, "Dude, are you alright?". We started out as "super angmoh guys" then came Pris and Zu who turned us into "super cheenah boys". We whine about them when they go shopping in 2006. 2008, they whine at the both of us when we do shopping cos we're even better than them.

Brother, I sincerely thank you for all the sacrifice you made. The super big cardboard I'll keep it hanging in my room. Thank you for taking care of her during the times when she's angry with me. Thank you for putting sense into Pris and Mab when they're out of mind. Thank you for telling me that everything will be fine when I'm at the lowest point in my life when Caleb was still very ill. Thank you for cooking me a big feast and tell me I can do it. Thank you for telling me that my singing rock when it suck. Thank you for appreciating me play on the piano, thank you for every single little thing you did.

Study hard and we'll complete and see who's A level results is better. I've already won you in Chinese surprisingly, well, we shall see if you can score 78. Well, things gonna change from now on. I'll remember your stares and glares which make me laugh all the time. Thank you, you're one of the best brother I ever had.

It's 11.41pm already. I'll be leaving soon. :-( Three more people to address before I shut my laptop, worship one last time, and fly off. Caleb, Davier and Ridley.

Caleb, I'm glad that you're on your way to recovery. Seems like my tears are all useless because nothing bad happened to you. Thank God for that. We drifted apart then after you're down, I realise you're of great importance to me. Without you, church will be rather boring to me during preaching when I was in Secondary. Now that you've almost fully recovered, I thank God for answering to my prayers. The other churchies will take good care of you. Thank you for everything since the day I was born. The times we run around church and play around with Maximilian, Ruth, Zach, Davier. Thank you for "opening" me up, from a boy who doesn't talk to someone so crappy.

Davier, we're drifted apart, from the 4 of us, till today we seldom talk, other than the few words exchange in church. I really cherished you as a brother. And it was childish of me to fall out with you because of her. Now that she've found herself someone who will dote on her and take care of her, you don't have to worry much. And let's just give them the best wishing. Time to get over her and find another girl for yourself. Maybe it's just fated that both of you can't get together. Nevertheless, I wish you can stay happy and study hard of course. Churchies will still be there for you whenever you need them. Pastor's there to talk to you whenever you need him, Ruth's still there. Don't worry much for me. We're boys we can always take good care of ourselves. All the very best for you.

Lastly, Ridley. Ok it's rather weird for me to address you. Because maybe some others will be jealous because didn't address them. Take good care of her but don't give in to her too much. Don't turn her back into her old stubborn and wilful self. I know you'll love her and I thank you for looking after her. But don't you ever dare hurt her or make her cry. I'll get someone to kill you if you ever do so. I know she's in good hands. You're a nice online friend, a very very nice one. We'll meet some day..

Enough of all the thanking speeches etc. We left with a tight hug each and yes, that's when tears started flowing down again. After which, we went over to church and have a last meet up with the churchies and Pastor. Last worshipping session, together with Dad and Mom, before we return. Then had some last words with Pastor. After that we sat down and have a little chat.

This time, I don't even know how long I'll be away. But thank God Macy and Maxy will be coming over. Dad sold our house at Jalan Rimau, and bought a house over at Chicago. Zach, Pris and Darryl will be staying with us, while Christy will be staying with her cousins.

Till years again we meet, I wish all of you all the very best. God bless you, and especially you..

I'll still be your guardian angel. Always here for you, though we are like few thousand kilometres apart, don't worry, I'm still watching you. Everything you do, if Lek, Mab, ValG, Ridley etc ever complains about you doing the wrong thing, you'll still get it from me. :-) Now you not only have to think about Davier when you hear Guardian Angel, but also Bry Bry. Remember, you have the whole world with you, don't fail them, don't fail yourself. Time to really really think of what you want to achieve in life and yes, treasure this relationship with him. You're definitely loved, by not just Ridley, not just myself, but all of us.

A thousand misses for everyone.. :-(