It's already July. I've been in Chicago for more than half a year. I still don't feel familiarised, I don't feel belonged, I feel like I left something in Singapore. This is a secret that's been inside me for very long, and it'll be there forever, because I don't intend to tell anyone. Saying it out doesn't change anything positively, but perhaps make things worse.

I don't mind pursuing my studies here. In fact, this was what I wanted. Ironically, I'm also the one who's complaining about everyone here. Dad and Mom is getting on good terms now because she finally got a job. Not much changes for me though. Christy may be moving over to be with us because she's ultra close with the couple now and she can't spend a second without them.

Maxy and Macy is getting older. I feel like we're neglecting them. But thank God, Darryl's always there to play with them. I took them out for a walk today at the park nearby. I start reminiscing about years ago, when the both of them are out, I can hardly control them. I've to chase them all the time, with their leash and make sure I don't lose them because they're full of energy. Right now, they hardly run. They spend most of their time lying down, looking at the blonde kids sliding down the slides, swinging on the swings, and chasing around the playground.. They're not really aging, but they will be..

Maybe it's time I start to treasure my two siblings before they leave me. I'm the only child. Despite having lots of friends from church, they're my closest. They are the ones I confide when Dad and Mom was busy. I'll be bringing them to the studio for some photo-taking sessions this coming holiday. Maxy, Macy, the best companions I can ever find. But I doubt I'm the best in their hearts. Maybe I used to be, but I'm starting to neglect them, I'm taking away my place from their hearts, myself..

And girl, I hope you can solve this yourself.